The dear reader has to excuse Kitchee for the long and undoubtedly excruciatingly painful hiatus of the past year and a half. For you see my lovely little fur balls of fur, like a true uncool tourist, Kitchee always harbored a deep longing to get even once the chance to hug a koala bear. That’s right; Kitchee wanted to wrap her arms around one of those smelly, grumpy bears that hang on to the trees for their lives in an attempt to not fall down in their stoned stupor. Naturally, the next logical step was to move to Australia.
After 1,5 years, Kitchee still has not hugged a koala bear, but has seen two in a local zoo, which is close enough. And in all honesty, those furry-buttocked marsupials actually aren’t all that anyway. Domestic guinea pigs do just fine.*
Anybitterway, at the moment Kitchee is still hitting the keyboard in the promised land of all-things-creepy-that-will-kill-you-by-giving-you-a-heart-attack (I’m looking at you, huntsmen spiders (note: in the interest of completing this post and not giving herself a heart-attack, there will not be a link to a picture of a huntsman spider.)), but will return to the promised land of all-things-massive-that-will-kill-you-by-eating-you-alive (I’m looking at you, bears).
Speaking of bears, this charming necklace has an important message for all the mortals among you; riches will not bring you happiness. Thanks mostly to Sofia Coppola, we are all aware of the strangely-pastel-coloured and tragic story of Marie Antoinette; the parties with the cool aristokids, the cake and the unhappy marriage to the short Louis XVI of France. Despite the gold and glam, she did not feel loved or glad.
The gold(coloured) and glam necklace features some of the most beautiful plastic pearls your side of the world has seen. The luxurious-looking castle is a heavily miniaturised representation of the Palace of Versailles, reminding the owner of this piece of jewellery and all the pessimists out there that you cannot escape your unhappiness even in a castle. Lastly, this uplifting work of art sports a portrait of Louis XVI himself and Marie Antoinette on the other side, covered in cold glaze for more endurance. Because that is what we need in this world my gloomy readers; endurance. To finish, a sparkling crown pendant was included to remind you that you are poor.
And that ends our lesson for today, kids. Remember that no matter how poor you are, at least you weren’t executed by a motherflipping guillotine. Turn that frown upside down, have a nice day and go annoy someone with your fake chirpiness!
*Apropos, ever seen a guinea pig in one of those rodent exercise balls? Best. entertainment. ever. Something a koala could never do. Mostly because you cannot fit them in the exercise ball.
10,90€
Can be ordered by emailing kitchee.jewellery(at)gmail.com
